


self-denial such a wonderful and powerful thing

by LPSunnyBunny



Series: Carry Me Home [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Biting, But He Does Understand Want, Cockwarming, Collars, Confessions of love, Consensual Somnophilia, Dave Strider Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Dirk Strider Doesn't Understand Feelings, Dirk is an Attentive Dom, Dom/sub, Gentle Sex, Godtier Powers used for sex, Incest, Introspection, Kink as a form of self care, M/M, Mentions of chastity, Mentions of choking, Possessive Behavior, Praise Kink, Rough Sex, Semi-Yandere Dirk Strider, Shibari, Sibling Incest, Sleep Sex, Subspace, piss mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:59:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23991895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LPSunnyBunny/pseuds/LPSunnyBunny
Summary: Several hookups after the first, Dirk has Dave sit and warm his cock. It spirals from there, and Dirk has a Realization.(Can be read as a standalone.)(Previously called Protected)
Relationships: Dave Strider/Dirk Strider
Series: Carry Me Home [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1730038
Comments: 16
Kudos: 137
Collections: Sunny's Portfolio





	self-denial such a wonderful and powerful thing

**Author's Note:**

> My Dirk is trans post surgery but since it doesn't come up in a meaningful way I won't tag it.

Dirk is a logical guy. He’ll admit it, he doesn’t really… _get_ a lot of emotions. Whenever he reads things talking about “great rushes” and “swells” of emotions that “consume their entire being”, it makes him feel weird. Like an almost-longing, but not quite? A semi-hollow ache behind his breastbone.

He always wonders what it feels like, to feel strongly. To be overrun with emotions. He’s mostly made his peace with it. But sometimes, he wonders what it feels like, to have such all-consuming feelings, stealing away rational thought.

Well, he supposes it doesn’t really matter. It’s not like it really makes much of a difference. Dirk’s actions would be the same regardless of if they had strong emotions behind them or not.

He would still have ended up here, in the position he’s currently in. His younger brother Dave, stretched out on the couch with his torso in a shibari harness, arms secured over his stomach, blanket draped over him to keep him warm, lying halfway ontop of Dirk, drifting as Dirk lightly pets his hair, face pressed to Dirk’s neck as he watches a movie.

Honestly, Dirk’s only really half-paying attention to the movie. His focus is on Dave, on every little shift and breath that Dave takes, watching for discomfort or unease. He can’t forget that first time that Dave came to him, face red and hands very-carefully-not-shaking as he lays the idea of Dirk tying him up out onto the table. Can’t forget the first time that Dirk actually did it, with the panic attack that Dave had worked himself into and then sobbed about, pissing himself in the process.

Honestly, Dirk knows he’s into some kinky shit. Dave crying as Dirk pinned him down was an instant boner- but he never could have expected enjoying watch Dave pee himself. That was certainly an awakening that he handled like a fucking boss.

The panic attack, though- not good. Dave clearly has _issues_ going on. Some extremely carefully worded questions to Rose brought up some possible answers and even more questions and a desire to find a way to time travel back to before the game and beat the shit out of his alternate self.

That was the first time Dirk had ever really gotten _angry_ before. It was interesting. He doesn’t think he would like to repeat it again.

As he gently rubs his fingers through the hair at the nap of Dave’s neck, Dirk contemplates this new stage in their… relationship. It would be gaudy to call them _boyfriends_ , how juvenile. Lovers, perhaps, but Dave seems uninterested in defining exactly what they are. “Brothers who fuck” is certainly gauche. “Friends with benefits” isn’t exactly accurate, either, considering that they do have a certain level of commitment to each other.

Just as certainly as Dave would not trust anyone else to put him in this state, Dirk would not trust anyone else to not take advantage of or hurt Dave when he’s like this.

Dirk’s done his research. He knows what Dave calls “that space” is subspace. Taking him out of his head, out of the constant war dogging his footsteps.

The constant-? Hm. Dirk resolves to think about that later. He may have had a breakthrough over where Dave’s issues are stemming from.

Dave _needs_ this, though. He needs someone to take control, needs to bring him down into subspace and keep him contained so he can shake apart. The first time was panic attack inducing, the second time he struggled and fought hard enough to give himself rope burns. The third was the first time he safeworded, having overestimated what he could take when it came to sensory deprivation. He can’t handle having his hearing cut off.

Dirk was _so_ proud of him for that. Accounts he’s read indicate that nervous or insecure subs have a harder time safewording, trying to push through and be good for their doms when it’s past their limits and ending up hurting themselves. The fact that Dave safeworded when it was something he couldn’t handle is a good sign- it means Dave isn’t _quite_ as self-destructive as Dirk had worried.

The fourth time, though, that was an _experience._ Dave had let Dirk tie him up and blindfold him and give him too much water to drink, then sob and shatter apart and cry so _beautifully_ as Dirk fucked him ruthlessly, nothing slow or gentle about it, bending Dave in half on the bed and mating pressing him into submission, fucking him roughly until Dave pissed himself, all over his own chest, shaking and crying.

Fuck, Dirk still jerks off to the memory of Dave’s splotchy, hazed out expression when Dirk took off his blindfold.

And that brings them to this time, where Dave had agreed to a new thing Dirk wanted to try. He took to the ropes remarkably well this time, settling easily as Dirk tied him up. He must have been craving this, not needing to be in control, because as he tested the ropes he barely struggled, breathing deep and rocking a bit before settling and letting Dirk manipulate him, bring him over to the couch and sprawl out.

This was just the first stage. Getting Dave all relaxed and hazy, so that he’d be in a good headspace for the next bit.

Speaking of which… “Dave.” Dirk murmurs, pressing a kiss to the top of Dave’s head. Dave makes a soft noise to indicate he’s listening, but doesn’t move. “Can you move for me?”

Dave raises his head slightly, squinting. Dirk cups the back of his neck, bending forwards to kiss Dave, slow and deep. When he pulls back Dave’s eyes slowly flutter open, mouth staying open for a moment before he nods.

“Good boy.” Dave shivers at the words. That was another thing that Dirk discovered- praises, little words of encouragement, they make Dave so soft and pliable in his hands. Dirk scooted up so he could be in more of a sitting up position. “Turn over for me, Dave.”

A little maneuvering has Dave in Dirk’s lap, ass pressing up against Dirk’s cock as it juts from his undone pants. Dirk lubes it up with a couple of strokes, then he grabs Dave’s waist and encourages him up and then down, slowly sinking Dave down onto his cock.

It feels exquisite- Dave is so warm and velvet-soft around him, hole clinging to Dirk’s cock like a glove. Dave moans as Dirk sits him all the way down.

“Dirk…” He breathes, swaying slightly, squeezing and relaxing around Dirk’s cock. Dirk hums, pleased, and hooks his fingers in the ropes, gently encouraging Dave to lie back against Dirk’s chest.

“Good boy.” Dirk murmurs, pressing his mouth to Dave’s ear to feel him shiver. Dave’s mouth opens with a little wet noise. “Stay just like this, Dave.”

Dave nods a bit, but his hips are wiggling slightly, trying to shift and rock on Dirk’s cock, seeking stimulation. Dirk’s hands find his hips again, holding him down.

“Relax, Dave.” Dirk murmurs. “Settle down.” Holding his hips as Dave squirms but starts to settle down, breathing jerky. “That’s it. Good boy.” Dirk drops a kiss on Dave’s neck and lets go of his hips, draping one arm around Dave’s waist, below his tied arms. The other one comes up to rest over Dave’s chest, thumb finding the side of Dave’s neck and slowly rubbing back and forth over the vulnerable flesh.

Slowly, Dave’s twitching and squirming settles, and Dirk doesn’t give him any reason to start it up again, staying still and relaxed under Dave, just letting his cock nestle inside of Dave, throbbing in his warmth. A soft, delicious heat. Dirk wants to fuck up into it, make Dave squirm and gasp and cry, but there’s so something soft and tender about this, about having Dave sprawled on Dirk’s chest, expression hazy and soft, his hole slowly squeezing and relaxing.

Dirk keeps stroking his thumb over Dave’s neck as Dave tilts his head into the touch, eyes fluttering slightly. Dirk takes the moment to study Dave’s features, his expression. His face is slack with a soft kind of trust, one that never fails to make Dirk’s heart squeeze a bit in his chest. His mouth is slack, Dirk could most certainly slip his fingers in there and Dave would suck on them.

Dirk presses his nose to Dave’s temple, just breathing slowly, breathing in the trust that Dave is giving him. His thumb strokes slowly over Dave’s neck, over his pulse point. He could squeeze down right now and cut off the blood flow to his brain. He could pin Dave down and choke him, wrap his hands around Dave’s neck and watch the life fade from his eyes and _Dave trusts him not to do that._

It’s humbling. Dirk knows he could never give this kind of gift to anyone, could never make himself this vulnerable. But Dave- Dave comes apart so easily in Dirk’s arms, trusts him to hurt him and then _put him back together again._ And that’s astonishing. Just the idea of doing the same thing makes Dirk break out in a cold sweat.

Dirk takes a slow breath, feeling the warmth of Dave’s body through his clothing. That’s another thing that Dirk enjoys. Having Dave completely naked while Dirk stays clothed- it’s a power dynamic Dirk can’t resist. Subtly implying that Dave is just there for him, for Dirk to use- his cock throbs inside Dave just thinking about it.

Well. Dave seems to be taking to it well, so maybe the other kind of cockwarming will go over well with him. Dirk hasn’t tried introducing blowjobs into their… he’s actually not quite sure what to call them. ‘Sessions’? That works. He hasn’t tried introducing blowjobs into their sessions yet. Maybe he’ll do that next time.

But with Dave fully naked, Dirk can run his hand over his body, can tease and tweak and stroke anything he wants and Dave has no ability to resist. Dirk rubs his other hand over Dave’s belly, down his little trail to his dick, which is hard but starting to go down as Dave just breathes slowly. Dirk runs his fingers through the hair around the base of Dave’s cock, scratching his fingers through it to feel Dave squirm.

“Stay still.” Dirk reminds him, mouth pressed to Dave’s ear again. “Good boys get rewarded.” A test, seeing if- Ah. Dave shudders and goes tight around Dirk at those words, going still, barely breathing.

“Good.” Dirk breathes, and his hand closes around Dave’s cock. Dave shivers, but doesn’t move otherwise. “When sitting on my cock, keeping it warm, this doesn’t matter.” Dirk murmurs, giving Dave’s cock a little squeeze. Dave shivers, a moan caught in his throat. Dirk smiles a bit, pleased at his hypothesis being true. “Next time,” he says, pressing a kiss below Dave’s ear, “I should cage you. Keep this out of the way.”

A tiny little gasp slips from Dave’s mouth, his eyes shut tight.

“Would you like that?” Dirk breathes, pitching his voice a bit lower. “Make you serve me while locked up so you can’t get hard?” He nips at Dave’s earlobe and is gratified at the stuttered moan that slides from Dave’s throat. “Good. That’s what good boys do, after all. They serve their dom without concern for their own pleasure.”

Not strictly true, but it’s what _Dave_ needs. He can see the goosebumps breaking out on Dave’s arms.

He gives Dave’s cock another squeeze, not stroking, just holding. Dave trembles, head tipped back against Dirk’s shoulder- but he’s staying still, not moving but for the twitching of his thighs, the moving of his mouth as he shakily breathes.

“ _Good._ ” Dirk purrs. “Dave, do you want me to fuck you?”

“Yes-” Dave gasps, moaning the word without shame. “ _Please,_ Dirk, I’m being so good-”

“You are.” Dirk confirmed, nuzzling against Dave’s temple as Dave whines softly. “You’ve being _very_ good.” He gives Dave’s cock another squeeze and lets go. “But not yet. I’m not done having you sit on my dick and keep it warm.”

Dave lets out a disappointed whine and Dirk smirks into Dave’s hair. He can’t help wanting to mean to Dave. Something about his younger brother in a vulnerable state makes something in Dirk’s chest _purr_ hungrily. Wanting to see him squirm and cry and sob. A clawing, delightful viciousness that Dirk keeps strongly locked away, only allowing tiny little whispers of it to trickle out when it’s safe to.

“Don’t worry, Dave. I’ll get you there.” Dirk soothes him, petting over Dave’s stomach to help settle him. Dave shudders, but slowly starts to relax again, thighs trembling as the tension in his body starts to unwind. Dirk runs his hand over Dave’s belly, down over a thigh, stroking gently, other hand resting over Dave’s collarbone, not quite surrounding his neck, but just on the edge of it.

He deliberately stays away from Dave’s dick, not wanting to rile him up again. That _would_ be too mean. Instead he strokes slowly, soothing Dave down into a relaxed, boneless state.

Dave’s breathing gradually slows again. Once he’s relaxed again, Dirk settles his hand over Dave’s belly again, a comfortable weight, sliding his other hand up to circle around Dave’s neck. Not squeezing, just- resting.

He can feel the bob of Dave’s throat as he swallows, and then, deliberately, Dave tilts his head back a little more. Dirk’s pulse rushes in his ears, a hot ache running through him, filling his veins.

He presses his nose into Dave’s hair again, breathing slowly, wrestling himself under control. Dave is just showing submission. He’s _just showing submission. He has not given Dirk permission to choke him._ Dirk needs to _ask_ and _talk to Dave about this_ before he can go around cutting off Dave’s airway and potentially causing a panic attack.

Dirk shudders slightly. God. How tight would Dave be, how much would he fight and cry and _break_ if Dirk fucked him when he was in a panic attack? His cock throbs eagerly-

 _No_. Dirk forcibly wrests that part of his brain under control. That’s crossing a line. He can’t imagine that right now, because then he’ll want to pin Dave down and do it. Talk to Dave first. He’s wanted freakier things. Dirk very very carefully compartmentalizes those thoughts for later.

With that potential bad situation successfully avoided like a boss, Dirk lets his hand rest gently on Dave’s throat, just stroking his thumb over the soft, vulnerable skin. Dave sighs softly at the touch, squeezing around Dirk again before relaxing, a faint shiver running through him.

Dirk decides to remove the temptation. He slips his hand back down to rest over Dave collarbone, a safer touch. Dave sighs softly under the touch, completely lax against Dirk, boneless in a soft, gratifying way.

Dirk hums softly, pleased with how Dave’s settled again. He closes his eyes and tucks his face into Dave’s neck, just breathing. Just feeling his brother’s weight, his warmth. His slick hole around Dirk’s cock, warm and soft and wet and perfect. Feeling the rise and fall of Dave’s chest, the tiny little twitches of his legs.

Dirk wants to cling to him, never let him go. Wants to have Dave like this forever, tied and bound in Dirk’s arms, protected and _safe._ Wants to have Dave looking at Dirk- and _only_ Dirk. Dirk wants to monopolize him, consume all of his waking thoughts and actions, wants to invade his dreams and hold the attention of his entire being. He wants to fill Dave up to the brim with Dirk, wants to covet and touch every inch of Dave until it’s the only thing he feels, wants to have and hold and posses every inch of Dave, wants to press him into the sheets of Dirk’s bed and smother him with kisses and fuck him and be the one to see him cry and wipe away the tears and put him back together again to do it all over.

Is this love? Dirk doesn’t know. But he wouldn’t change it for anything.

So Dirk breathes slow and deep, savoring the press of Dave’s body on his, savoring the wet grip of Dave’s body around him, barely registering the world around them but for the shifts in audio from the movie on the TV. “Dave.” Dirk murmurs, his fingers sliding down Dave’s body, over intricately-laced ropes. “You with me?”

Dave makes a soft noise, nodding slightly. “Good.” Dirk presses a kiss behind Dave’s ear. “You’re doing so good for me, Dave.” He breathes in Dave’s ear, feeling the shiver that runs through him. “So perfect, sitting on my cock so well and keeping it warm. My perfect toy.”

A tiny little sound slips from Dave’s throat, weak and desperate. Dirk smirks to himself.

“Your ass fits so perfectly around me.” He breathes. “It’s like you were made for this, to warm cock. You sit so still, so perfectly.” Dave moans softly, and Dirk sees his fists tighten and loosen where they’re tied down over his chest.

“Keep doing that, doll.” Dirk murmurs. “Stay nice and relaxed while I take what I want.” He slips his hands down to Dave’s hips, winding his fingers into the ropes there and starting to rock his hips into Dave.

Dave gives a soft little whine but stays soft and boneless. “Good boy.” Dirk breathes. “Just like this.” He closes his eyes and moves a little firmer, use the ropes as handles to keep Dave in place, starting a slow, languid fuck into his little brother.

“That’s it, Dave. You’re being such a perfect doll for me. The best toy.” Dirk breathes. Dave’s breathing is starting to stagger, starting to be uneven and quick. Dirk slows his rocking, makes it longer and more gentle. “Easy.” He murmurs as Dave moans in disappointment. “Going to take it nice and soft today, Dave. So slow and gentle that you fall asleep.” God. The moment the words leave Dirk’s mouth he gets a spike of lust.

Having Dave asleep and perfectly relaxed around his cock? Fucking him slow and deep and watching his sleeping face flush with pleasure? Dirk is _absolutely_ bringing that up next time.

Or maybe…

“Dave.” Dirk murmurs. “You want to stay slow and deep like this for the next hour?” Maybe an overestimation of Dirk’s stamina, but it was a nice, quantifiable period of time. “Or do you want to cum now, pass out, and let me keep fucking you as you sleep?”

Dave shudders, his eyes fluttering as he thinks about his options. Finally, he licks his lips and asks, “will you leave marks if I pick the second? So I can- imagine it later?”

“I’ll leave so many marks for you.” Dirk promises. Oh, _yes._ Dave is his favorite person ever.

Dave shudders. “Th- the second.” He says. Dirk smiles against his neck.

“Alright. Relax for me, Dave.” Dirk murmurs and starts rolling his hips a bit harder, a bit deeper, sliding one hand down to cup over Dave’s cock, giving it something to fuck against.

Dave, his perfect, perfect brother, stays limp and relaxed, breathing roughly as Dirk fucks him, as Dirk lets his cock grind deep and and presses the heel of his hand against the head of Dave’s cock, until he cums with a sighing moan and a shudder, spilling across his belly.

“Good boy.” Dirk murmurs, slowly until Dave’s just sitting on his dick again, enjoying the rippling squeezes as Dave comes. “Good job, Dave. So perfect.”

Dirk closes his eyes, reaching for his power. He can feel the soft, shivery edges to Dave’s heart, and all the bonds that reach out from it. The feeling of Dave’s bond to him never fails to make him humbled, iron-wrought and a deep, vivid red.  
  
He watches, though, as Dave starts to slide down, relaxing into exhaustion, and he murmurs. “Sleep, Dave. I have you.” And he very very very lightly, very carefully, numbs the connection Dave has to wakefulness.

He watches as Dave sinks into unconsciousness. His testing of his powers had shown this was possible- but he hadn’t actually used it on a human before. The length of the numbing varies, depending on how much power Dirk uses, and he used just enough that Dave should be out for a solid two hours.

To test it, though…

“Dave?” Dirk murmurs. No response. Dave’s face is relaxed in sleep. Dirk reaches down and trails his fingers over Dave’s softening cock. Not even a twitch from Dave. Dirk closes his fingers around it and slowly squeezes, to the point he knows would jerk someone away from the discomfort of it.

Daves brows furrow a bit, his head lolling, but his breathing stays deep and slow.

Dirk lets go and groans, heat pulsing through him. “Fuck.” He breathes. “ _Fuck._ Dave. You perfect fucking-” His hands sink into the ropes around Dave’s hips, using them as leverage to start fucking up into Dave, deep and rough, bouncing his brother’s limp body on his cock. “ _Dave.”_ Dirk groaned, slamming his hips up, slapping his hips up into Dave’s ass, into that soft, loose hole of Dave’s. “ _Fuck-_ ” He hisses, hauling Dave down and grinding in deep. He can’t cum yet- fuck, that almost put him over the edge.

He sits there and rocks into Dave, trying to calm his pounding heart. That was close- he almost just wasted the entire purpose of this.

“You’re too good, Dave.” Dirk breathes, kissing up Dave’s neck. “You’re too fucking good.”

After a moment to let himself settle, Dirk works Dave off of his cock, letting him rest on the couch for a minute. He stands up on wobbly legs, turning off the TV and taking a deep breath.

“Oh, Dave.” He says, looking at his sleeping brother’s relaxed face. “You should not have given me this power.” He gathers Dave up in his arms and strides over to lay him out on the bed, climbing on top of him and caging him in on all fours.

He hovers over Dave, looking down at his sleeping face, nose-to-nose with him, just breathing and watching him. Drinking in his face, in his features, in a way that he never could while awake. Tracing every line, every curve, every dip and edge. Dirk shifts so he can kneel with his legs on either side of Dave’s chest, freeing both hands to cup Dave’s face.

His fingers run up Dave’s cheeks as he cups his head, thumbs stroking over his cheekbones. Dirk lets his fingers spread and slide up into Dave’s hair, fingers seeking out the curves and bumps of his scalp, feeling the texture of Dave’s hair over his fingers. His gaze fixed on Dave’s face. He runs his fingers over Dave’s forehead, over his nose, traces his eyebrows, the sweep of his eyelashes. Then, finally- his mouth, tracing his thumb over Dave’s lips and slipping it inside. Dave’s mouth falls open easily under Dirk’s touch and he feels his breath catch, staring into that soft, moist cavern, the tiniest hint of pink of Dave’s tongue visible.

Dirk feels like a man possessed. He cradles Dave’s face in his hands, leaning in and pressing his mouth to Dave’s, sliding his tongue in Deep. Dave’s mouth offers no resistance as Dirk laps and licks, tasting every inch, feverishly hot, reaching deeper and deeper, until he has to swing off of Dave’s chest and kneel next to him, fitting their mouths together to plunge his tongue in as deep as it will go, all the way back to the entrance of Dave’s throat, pressing their faces together as hard as he can, sucking in a deep breath so he can dive in again, feverish.

Dirk wants Dave. He _wants_ him, wants to hold him and have him and consume every part until there’s not any room left for anyone but Dirk. There’s a boiling fervor in his veins as he sucks on Dave’s lip, coaxes Dave’s tongue out and sucks on it and drags his teeth over the tender flesh, as he runs his tongue along Dave’s teeth and spears it into the back of Dave’s mouth, into his throat.

When Dirk finally pulls back, he’s panting, thick trails of spit dripping from his mouth, stringing to Dave’s. He stares down at his sleeping brother, heart pounding and cock throbbing. Hunger boiling in his stomach. Something about Dave pulls things from his chest, pulls _wants_ and _needs_ from his belly, and Dirk normally can hold them back, can lock them away but right now Dave is _vulnerable_ and _open_ and _can’t resist_ -

He’s _all Dirk’s._

How can Dirk do anything but let the monster loose?

Dirk yanks at Dave’s legs, folding them up, pressing them into Dave’s chest, immediately shoving his cock into Dave’s soft, unresisting hole. Dirk hooks fingers into the ropes over Dave’s chest and slams home, pounding into Dave, using Dave’s own body as leverage to fuck hard and deep, rougher than he’d normally dare to when awake. Watching Dave’s limp form jerk and just _take_ Dirk’s cock, hips slapping together loudly, obscenely in the quiet room.

“Fuck- fuck-” Dirk pants, gritting his teeth, the boiling hunger urging him on, telling him _more._ “Dave.” He gasps, eyes fixed on Dave’s soft, peaceful face. “Dave, you’re _mine,_ little brother.” It feels so fucking sinful, so perfect and incredible, so full of lust and clawing, _burning_ desire in his throat. “All mine, no one else gets you, gets _any_ of you-”

Dirk rears up as he grinds his cock into Dave, sliding his feet back on the bed, then presses forwards, crushing Dave into the bed, the hot, hungry beast in his chest _roaring_ and clawing for Dave, for his brother, to possess all of him and _own_ him so that no one else can touch him. He presses his face to Dave’s neck as he uses the strength of his lower half to shove in, fucking down into Dave, and sinks his teeth into Dave’s shoulder.

He holds on tight with hands and teeth as he fucks, as he braces his feet on the bed and pistons his hips forcefully into Dave, wanting to fuck Dave hard enough that he’ll feel it for _weeks,_ remember who he _belongs_ to.

“Fuck-” Dirk lets go with his teeth as he remembers something he has tucked away in a drawer. He slams home and grinds hard, trying to get as deep as possible, legs shaking, toes straining against the mattress, and he has to hold Dave in place, hold him down so he doesn’t slide up the bed.

Dirk sucks in deep, feverish breaths, trying to wrestle himself under control. Finally, he pulls back, sliding his cock free, and sits back on his heels, looking at Dave’s hole.

 _Fuck,_ Dirk wants to shove his tongue in there. It’s puffy and swollen from Dirk’s abuse, just a hint of a gape- Dirk wants to slide his cock right back in and plug Dave up again, but he resists, slipping off the bed and going to hunt for it, hands shaking. He finds it and comes back and fits the leather collar around Dave’s neck, and his chest _purrs_ in delight. A tangible proof of his ownership over Dave.

“Dave.” Dirk breathes, cradling Dave’s neck in his hands, over the collar, heart pounding. “So fucking perfect.” He leans in and kisses Dave again, long and slow and gentle, the monster in his chest crooning and purring. “All mine.” He murmurs into Dave’s mouth. “You’re _mine._ ” He nips lightly at Dave’s lower lip. Dave is so soft under his hands, he wants to hold him so tight and never let him go- wants to touch him and cherish him and kiss his cheeks and mouth and nose and every one of his fingers until Dave grins at him, until Dave reaches for him and stops flinching at touches.

“I’ll always take care of you, Dave.” Dirk breathes, and lets the hunger take him again, rising up in his chest. He slips down Dave’s front and plants a kiss to the tip of Dave’s cock, popping it into his mouth for a second as his bobs his head, enjoying the soft, sleepy moan that Dave gives. He licks over Dave’s cock until it’s slick and shiny with spit, warm and fat in his mouth.

“There you go, little brother.” Dirk breathes, and lightly blows over the wet flesh, smirking to himself. “Nice and wet.” He reaches for Dave, rolls him over, and settles between his legs, reaching for the lube. He hooks Dave’s hole open with his thumb, tilts the bottle, and drizzles a long, thing line of lube into Dave, watching it sink into him. After a couple of moments, he caps the lube and sets it aside, lining up his cock with Dave’s hole and sinking in again. The heat in his chest bubbles as he sinks back into his brother’s body, a low moan sliding from Dirk’s mouth.

“ _Dave…_ ” He groans, bending forwards and starting a slow, deep fuck. Dave’s hole is full of slick, full of lube and it’s a wet, messy glide, Dirk’s cock fucking into the reservoir of cool liquid that is rapidly warming to Dave’s body temperature. The noises are wet and obscene, slick _squelches_ and messy, wet sounds of skin-on-skin.

He wants to rub his cock into every inch of Dave’s tight hole, wants to sink his cock in and never pull it out again so that Dave’s body _remembers_ who it belongs to. Remembers that it’s Dirks, that Dirk is the only one who can make Dave feel this way, who can make Dave squirm and fall apart and cry and feel _seen._

Dirk allows the heat in his chest to surge, the monster to snarl and _take,_ not having to care about Dave’s pleasure when he’s asleep so heavily like this so he just _fucks_ instinctively, rough and sharp and quick, no semblance of rhythm or form, just grabbing at Dave, at his hips, at his shoulders, yanking at him as he drives his hips into Dave’s soft, warm, _inviting_ body, panting, dragging his nails over Dave’s back, catching on the ropes and pulling on them, leaving little scattered scratches across Dave’s skin. He grinds in deep, hands gripping Dave’s hips so tightly that Dirk hopes they bruise.

“ _Mine._ ” Dirk growls, leaning forwards to crush Dave into the bed, starting a deep, sharp snapping of his hips, humping into Dave. Each slick, wet thrust forces more lube from his hole, wet and leaking and oozing. “You’re mine, Dave. You’re _mine._ ” He sinks his teeth into Dave’s shoulder again, letting go of his hips and grabbing at the ropes, fisting them and pulling them tight across Dave’s skin, yanking Dave’s body upwards with every fuck, using the motion to rock and buck into Dave, panting and humping and grinding deep, wanting to blue their edges, wanting to nestle into Dave’s skin and fuse until there’s no way of telling where Dave ends and Dirk begins.

Dirk wants to _own_ Dave- body, soul, mind, heart- he wants to sink his teeth into it all and never let go, eat it all until Dave is safe and warm and taken care of and _protected_.

“Dave.” Dirk gasps, sweat rolling down his spine, stinging his eyes. He doesn’t want to stop, he doesn’t want this to end, wants to be like this for ever. He blinks hard, forcing the sweat away. “Dave, my brother, my precious little brother.” His thighs are aching, legs hurting from the punishing, brutal pace that Dirk is trying to keep. He goes up onto his toes, trying to gain more leverage, but his sweaty feet slide on the sheets and he collapses forwards, pressing along Dave’s back, hips rocking and humping into Dave, panting and gasping, pressing his mouth to the back of Dave’s neck.

“Dave.” Dirk breathes, shaky, mouth dry, hair damp with sweat, palms damp as he drags them over Dave’s body, over Dave’s perfect form, over his brother. The words catch in his throat and he gives a rough jerk of his hips. “I love you.” He tries, stilted and strange, but the monster in his chest _purrs._ “I love you.” He tries again, rawer this time, torn from his throat.

He needs- he needs to see Dave’s face. Dirk scrambles on the bed, limbs aching as he rolls Dave over, spreads his legs and, with shaking thighs, grinds back into his soppingly slick hole, back into Dave. “Dave.” Dirk gasps, hands finding Dave’s face, cupping his cheeks. He presses his mouth to Dave’s as he grinds, slow and deep, so rough and tender, thighs working through the pain, through the shakes, to fill his little brother up.

“I love you.” Dirk breathes, torn open and raw, against Dave’s mouth. “I love you, I _love you Dave-”_ A terrible tightness is in his throat, clawing his words away from his tongue.

“I love you.” Dirk gasps and kisses Dave and pulls back to fuck once, twice- finally letting himself plunge deep and cum, ropes and ropes of hot, thick cum flooding Dave, Dirk moaning freely and humping through his orgasm, rubbing his cum into every inch of Dave’s insides, fucking it as deep as it will go to make it last as long as possible inside Dave.

It doesn’t seem to _stop_ , each pulse of pleasure just coursing through him, and it’s his legs that give out on him first, stiff and refusing to move as he collapses on Dave’s chest, cock jerking and pulsing as he reaches for Dave’s head, pulls him into a wet, desperate kiss.

“I love you.” Dirk breathes against Dave’s mouth. “I love you, _Dave, do you know that I love you?_ ” And there’s a deep, rumbling purr from the monster in his chest. Dirk shudders.

“If you did this with anyone else I believe I would kill them.” Dirk murmurs, finally saying out loud what he’s known since the second time, but couldn’t say. “No one else can have you Dave.”

Dirk cups Dave’s face, pressing their foreheads together, and just breathes. Just slow and deep, calming the beast in his chest. It was easy enough with it satiated and purring, allowing itself to be boxed back up easily and returned to it’s room. Even after it was just a tiny little thread in his chest, Dirk stayed there, breathing deep and slow, cock going soft inside of his brother’s wet, suckling hole, squeezing around it as it tries to close.

“Dave.” Dirk murmurs, and tries to say the words, but they die in his throat. He shakes his head slightly and leans in, pressing his mouth to Dave’s instead, silent and worshipful. Just molding their lips together, mouthing over it and being gentle, tender, kissing him soft and sweet over and over and over again, just nuzzling together and catching Dave’s mouth, filling Dirk up with a sweet lightness through his veins, coiling in his stomach.

When he pulls back, Dave’s lips look puffy and bitten- Dirk is sure his own faired no better. He strokes slowly over Dave’s forehead, over his hair, smoothing it back, just… looking. He kisses Dave again. Soft.

Finally, Dirk pulls back and finds the safety scissors and cuts Dave free. Being hungry and rough is no excuse to not take care of Dave- in fact the monster in his chest _demands_ that he does so. He frees Dave from every rope, tossing it aside, He rubs Dave down, from head to toe, front and back to make sure he doesn’t have any strained muscle pain when he wakes.

Then, Dirk hunts through his toys, finds an appropriate plug, and brings it back, working it into Dave’s abused, puffy, leaking hole to plug it up. The sheets are _coated_ with lube, but Dirk had the foresight to just always start having rubber sheets on his mattress after the first time, so he just picks Dave up and sets him on the couch to strip the sheets and change them.

Finally, with all of that done, Dirk carries Dave back over and lays him out on the bed, settling in next to him and pulling the blankets up over them. He runs his fingers over the collar, his heart fluttering at the sight of it, before regretfully detaching it.

Next time. He has a laundry list of thing to bring up, now. Can’t take it too fast. He reaches over and sets the collar in the drawer of his bedside table and grabs at Dave, pulling him in close so that Dirk can nestle his mouth against the top of Dave’s head, pressing a kiss there. He blinks once to clear the sweatdrops from his eyes, pressing another kiss.

“Don’t ever leave me, Dave.” Dirk says hoarsely, but he knows that if Dave ever truly spurned him, told him to never touch him again, Dirk would have no choice to obey. It doesn’t matter what the monster in his chest wants- Dave’s happiness comes first. Every time.

Dirk hooks a leg over Dave’s hip and tugs his limp form closer, closing his eyes and pulling up his power. He takes a deep breath and gentle tugs the numbness away from the strand connecting Dave to waking.

Dave’s induced sleep sinks into a deeper one. Dirk just presses another kiss to the top of his head and settles in to sleep.

When Dave wakes up, Dirk will ask him how he’s feeling. Then, if Dave’s feeling alright, Dirk will put him on his belly and dump another load in him.

But for now, sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this, check me out on twitter at [@LPSunnyBunny](http://www.twitter.com/LPSunnyBunny)!


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